Spirit of the New Site - read it here

http://www.goingyourownway.com/Principles

The link above has better formatting, but have included the text below.  Your reactions are welcome.

Going Your Own Way – Principles
Going Your Own Way is a community, first and foremost. The site and us moderators exist to create the right environment for the community to thrive. Going Your Own Way is YOU. Because of that, we want to be selective and attract the right people.

Going your way is understanding the actual nature of women, seeing the truth about gender interactions and relationships. This can be jarring, unsettling. It's the very reason 99% of people around you prefer to live in a world of pretty lies than accept the ugly truth; it's the reason most of the men stayed put in Plato's Cave. GYOW is a supportive group of people who have traveled a similar road to you -- from the false blue-pill world to truth. Being around like minds eases the deprogramming fallout and prevents return to the old world. On one hand, it's natural to feel some anger. Momentary anger can be liberating because it steels you to break from the pack from the billions who are on the assembly line to “man up”, get married, pop out more corporate work slaves, and serve the role of a thankless, harried husband till the end. But ultimately, GYOW is about going your own way, transitioning to a Red Pill lifestyle, giving thanks that you woke up before it was too late, thriving, living and enjoying life.

So without further ado, what defines our GYOW community? Our community is:

True
The reason we deconstruct women, feminism, and female behavior is because we seek truth. The television, the newspapers, the radio, our education system, the 99% of people around us including well-intentioned friends and family give us a sugar-coated. Disney-esque and false representation of women as angelic and faultless. By standing outside the system, we can be objective about women and relationship dynamics in ways that others cannot. This is essential because we are the modern-day guerrilla radio on this topic: broadcasting reality against an avalanche of misinformation. Being true is about being inquisitive, thoughtful, curious, and insightful. The more you look at something, the more interesting wrinkles you find. Even well-understood MGTOW concepts like AWALT and Hypergamy can be understood in more nuanced ways with further examination. The opposite of truth is: absolutist, cynical, defeatist, a kind of “know-it-all”'ism with a shallow bumper-sticker logic behind it. We observe, learn, and share – and hopefully never stop.

Positive
Red-Pill MGTOWs don't live life in a defensive crouch. After the initial disorientation of taking the red pill, one can't help but be grateful at the time and money you've saved....so why not put that time and money to good use?? There are always things that perturb us about twats and the site is great for that – but oftentimes a sense of humor about the whole thing keeps it light. Which is what we want. Without that light-hearted tone, it's too easy to trigger those same old feelings of resentment or anger. Let's poke fun by all means at the ridiculous 42 year old obese woman on a dating site who is looking for a tall, young, fit millionaire to sweep her off her feet. Once you're through the looking glass, increasingly the truth about the opposite sex becomes a source of belly laughs. What's the opposite of this? Paranoia & never-ending bitterness. Let's be real, but keep it upbeat.

The Forum

Let's talk about the forum itself. Before I get into a list of things not to do, here are things you should do:

Do make interesting posts. Do start threads that make people laugh or think. Do ask questions. Do share your observations, insights from real life. Even if you're not sure others will agree, or it's just a theory. Do use interesting language, add pictures, reference quotes, post humorous animated gifs. We very much value users who consistently create great content, are conversation-starters, or just generally add value.

Don't:
Post anything referencing violence towards women (even if the woman provoked it; we don't want to go into that territory). No “playful” or subtle references along these lines.
Post anything referencing rape or accusations of rape (even if accusations are suspect)
Go on about sexual frustrations or engage in incel rage.
Post: racism, threats, promotion of products/sites.

Appreciate if you wouldn't:

Post random articles about some woman committing some random crime – articles/posts that dwell on negativity or an exaggerated profile of women
Knock the other red-pillers out there such as PUAs, MRAs. A little mockery never hurt anyone, but let's define ourselves by what we are, not by what we're not.
Post racially provocative articles even if explained with some evo-psych justification. There are other forums for that. We don't need to create needless division on a subject unrelated to MGTOW.

The key sub-forums are:

Lounge: Main forum. Anything goes. Posts/articles about women/society/feminism. Post about your life, experiences, insights, observations.

Living the Best Life: A big emphasis for us. Talk about: poker nights, video games, travel, lifting, books you're reading, that great anime you watched, sports you're doing, hobbies, philosophy, and on and on. It could be practical things like: working on cars, welding, or carpentry. Or it could be something mundane like a movie review or about getting organized through a system like 'Getting Things Done' by David Allen. This is all time that we're not lugging cupcake's shopping bags around the mall or getting kicked in the shins by a toddler – this is real living. There's no need for machismo (“a real man knows how to...”), showboating, or playing up our own lifestyles – just sharing the best life has to offer with fellow brothers on the forum.

Game: This one sets us apart. Our view is that being MGTOW means downing the 'red pill' and understanding the nature of women. Once you do so, the rest is up to you. It's a perfectly valid option to sit it out, to “ghost” when it comes to women. And it's just as valid to "scratch that itch" with escorts, either at home or abroad. But for guys who, knowing what they know, want to use game to set up plates, date, establish/manage FWBs (friends with benefits), this sub-forum is for that. So if you're a regular at RooshV or read Chateau Heartiste, it's all good. Some slight differences with MGTOW Game. We're not obsessed with notch-count, we don't define our worth as men in terms of “success” or “approval” by women. Plenty of great men with actual value (AV) don't necessarily have sexual market value (SMV) and don't care. Being a better man happens in “Living the Best Life”.

Action: Many of us were fumbling around in the blue-pill wilderness for decades. Why let another poor soul languish in the Matrix to go around getting rejected, orbit around a land whale for years, getting talked into a marriage he doesn't want or need, be brainwashed by feminism to think his purpose in life is to serve a woman or serve society by being a beta-male slave, having his surplus labor siphoned off by women, rugrats and Uncle Sam? Action is about steps we can take at a micro-level to spread the red pill. It could be as simple as creating a humorous image and posting it on 9gag. Or 4chan. Or bringing your red pill to the other online communities you're a part of. Action could mean letting people know about the GYOW site. Posting a red-pill quote on Twitter. When the opposition (feminism) controls the mainstream apparatus, why not conduct rebellious guerrilla operations at the grassroots and have some fun doing it?

Other: This serves a few areas. Subgroups of MGTOW like “ghosts” should post about things like ghosting here. While we use Lounge for insights/anecdotals/major articles, Other is for all the other news articles (less significant articles about women/society; but also unrelated topics). This is also a good place to vent/rant. Venting is part of the red pill experience, and Other can provide a release valve without negativity seeping into the rest of the site.

Off-Topic: Shooting the sh*t. Chat. One sentence posts are perfectly fine here. Comedy. YouTube videos. Stupid polls Anything unrelated to MGTOW.

That's it.

Welcome and enjoy,
Jagr

Looks good.

However, I suggest having sub-subforums. As in subforums within the subforum (Inception ftw   ).

Joking aside, what I mean is if we take Subforum Lounge, in it we should have more subforums such as New Member Intro, General
Discussion, Anecdotals and Male Rights.


In the Living The Best Life Subforums we can have subforums such as Travel, Books, Games, Sports.

I am not exactly sure how to divide the Game and Other.

I agree about New Member Intro. Though I might make that a subforum of the Main Forum.

I don't know about too many subforums. They get barren. They tend not to have critical mass. I personally think its better to consolidate topic areas in a single sub-forum to have more activity.

General Discuss + Anecdotals will be the stuff of the Lounge.

Men's Rights will be in Action (though I could call that out).

So, without further "farewell"...? (which is what "adieu" means)

Or, so, without further ado...? (as in Shakespeare's "Much Ado About Nothing")

Seems fair and looks good; though as long as it's reliable and easy to use, I'm always happy enough.

I'm not going to be a trouble-causing PITA or anything, so I'll just say a few things here, at the very beginning, which you can take on board or not as you will, and I hopefully won't bring it up again.  It is, of course re: the Game side of things... dun dun duuun!

I can remember your posts from a while back Jagr, about this sort of thing; so I guess that the tone and the niche will be that it'll be discussed in a more mature and responsible kind of way, and be a bit more interesting-theory based?  So something that even those (like me) who have zero interest in that side of things will still be able to get something from, even if it's just intellectual (the deconstruction and exposing of female nature) or in also seeing some techniques that can be applied to other interactions with women, on the odd occasion when the likes of me are reluctantly forced to do so?

So it won't look crass, tacky and juvenile to outsiders; and that side of things will be pretty rigidly confined to that specific sub-forum and not spill out into the larger forum?  [Much as I'm generally against heavy-handed moderation, I'm all for it in this one specific case.]

I think that this might be especially important for yourself here, since you also want to incorporate your Action component - kind of 'MRA-lite'; which is interesting, and I'm looking forward to seeing where that goes - and being part of it from time to time.  You're not being the more passive kind of MGTOW (who can reasonably say 'We don't care what anyone else thinks!  This is what we are, we're not going to change; join us or don't'), but you want an active, fighting back component too.  You are engaging with the wider, mainstream culture, and trying to win some hearts and minds: that makes you more of an enemy of the mainstream culture, and it will fight back, especially as it becomes increasingly totalitarian.

Thing is that Men's Rights is ethically and politically purely righteous, and nobody has much of a leg to stand on to claim that it isn't; so they have to resort to filthy Alinsky-ite tactics of moving the focus away from what it's really about, to conflating it with things that are morally dubious in the mainstream (PUA/Game) or (more usually 'and') morally reprehensible (mentally disturbed individuals who committed heinous acts, who could be tied in with the MRM, however mendaciously, by the mainstream)*.

That's why pro-male places have their rigid no violence rules, and the more MRA-focused ones have done all they can to also distance themselves from PUAs; they've been at this a long time and they know the craic.  From reading your posts, I have faith that if anyone can pull this off you can Jagr  , but you might find that you end up being forced to ditch Game or Action, as most everybody else has (IME).  We'll see.

*Just off the top of my head....  The SPLC MRM-smearing reports and articles commonly conflated the MRM with PUAs (and nutcase killers): There's a few there for anyone's Googling pleasure.

The pretty powerful and influential Jessica Valenti 'dealt with' the MRM (with air quotes and sneering at the very term), in a video, by instantly linking it to PUAs and a killer: JtO deals with it here from 6:40 - note what he said re the PUA bit:-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8i7FNwgyK8

Fidelbogen was fairly recently asked to take part in a major televised interview, declined, but sent a written statement to them about what the pro-male/non-Feminist movement was really all about.  Now there's a very clever dude who's been round the block several times, and been at this for ages, and seen it all before.  Note how he makes a point of distancing himself (and all of the other places where he hangs his hat) from PUAs; 5:08 to 5:52.  His comments are interesting too, and one was hilarious (IMO):-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHU4NyPmPQ8

[Well that was longer than I expected   but that's all I have to say on the matter, in one go, for the record.  On t'other hand, I'd like to see some of the divisions amongst blokes' groups be healed a bit, and I'll certainly be impressed and delighted if that can be managed with PUAs here, whilst maintaining a non-compromised Action bit.  Exciting times - lots of potential!  ]

My reaction is positive.

Suggestions:

"Don't...post promotion of products/sites". The only way I know about any of these mgtow boards is because someone promoted them in a post on some message board or blog.

I suggest a topic area that is only visible to members. This can come in handy when describing a personal experience and you don't want the world and it's search engines to make the connection to you irl.

I really liked the vetting process at the old board. Having to make an effort to post a well written introduction cut down on trolls and noise.

Did you decide if this board is going to be male only?

Hamsta- you bring up some interesting points. I can't say I understand all of them, but there seems like some inherent issues that come with both MRA and PUA territory and perhaps between the two of them. Will be good to get your perspective on these things as they move forward as well.

A few things: I hope never to be get pulled into this back and forth between people on YouTube, between blogs, and this endless circle-jerk of feminists, and masculinists having this internal debate that goes nowhere and wastes everyone's time and energy. I realize it's hard to avoid because when people talk about us, and they will, natural instinct to respond. But it's always struck me as a self-serving circle-jerk where in some way, those who are criticized, thrill to the response, because they very criticism tells them THEY ARE IMPORTANT. Their fueling this fire only cements their role in this very public drama. I plan to avoid it entirely. We are focused on building our own lives and to the extent we make a difference in the social arena, it will be through guerilla communication and memes that we create and disseminate, totally bypassing feminists and the channels they heavily influence.

On PUA, my post history may have some confused because I said good things about PUAs and negatives; here are just a few of my negative posts about PUAs:

http://www.mgtowforums.com/forums/mgtow-general-discussion/18471-i-have-theory-pua.html

http://www.mgtowforums.com/forums/mgtow-general-discussion/18330-pua-gets-phone-number-after-51-messages-okcupid.html

http://www.mgtowforums.com/forums/mgtow-general-discussion/19688-three-reasons-puas-creating-worse-world.html

I don't take sides. I am not ideological. I try to see the pros and cons of everything. My idiosyncratic view on PUA is that it has merit, but a lot of it's popular assumptions are simply false- including that success with women means being a better man; or that you can be a "better man" by learning game. No, you can score more chicks; isn't that enough? My whole idea on the subject is 'recreational game' or RecGame. It is one game within the larger game of life. I wouldn't see a MGTOW who does RecGame spending 4 hours every night honing his trade, or sending 51 messages on a dating site for a number like the PUA in my post above. When some down the Red Pill, I think it's easy to lose perspective and remember that part of the red pill is to remind ourselves that women just aren't that important. Blue Pill didn't just misinform us about female behavior and preferences, it strongly oversold the value of women and the significance of relationships. Having said all this, Game is power. It doesn't just have to be used to set up an ONS.

I've ranted long enough, so I'll leave it there. I'm excited about the evolution of these two areas; and we'll see where it goes....

Rouleur wrote:My reaction is positive.

Suggestions:

"Don't...post promotion of products/sites". The only way I know about any of these mgtow boards is because someone promoted them in a post on some message board or blog.

There's a difference between referencing a site which people will do all the time to refer to a red-pill blog or a MGTOW subreddit, etc. and promoting it by essentially using the forum as a marketing platform.

I suggest a topic area that is only visible to members. This can come in handy when describing a personal experience and you don't want the world and it's search engines to make the connection to you irl.

Could be useful. Will add that to the list of features we may consider going forward.

Did you decide if this board is going to be male only?

There was never really a discussion on whether women would be included. They won't be. The comment I made earlier was about having an Opposing Views sub-forum for non-members to post questions. There will never be an option for women to be part of the forum.

One other thing ... something that slapped me across the face like the Monty Python Fish Dance (the finale) when I checked back on the carcass of Nacho's forum.

I hope we can find a better way of paying for GoingYourOwnWay.com than by giving free rein and pop-up privileges to AdChoices, GoogleAds, CougarLife, PlentyOfFssssssss...

I'm willing to help pay the costs of running the new board.

Jagrmeister wrote:

There's a difference between referencing a site which people will do all the time to refer to a red-pill blog or a MGTOW subreddit, etc. and promoting it by essentially using the forum as a marketing platform.

There was never really a discussion on whether women would be included.  They won't be.  The comment I made earlier was about having an Opposing Views sub-forum for non-members to post questions.  There will never be an option for women to be part of the forum.

Great!

What's the strategy for not including women? Nacho's policy of requiring a well written intro as a first post was a very good way of discouraging undesirables. Only the most determined of trolls would put in that much effort.

[quote="Rouleur"]

Jagrmeister wrote:

What's the strategy for not including women? Nacho's policy of requiring a well written intro as a first post was a very good way of discouraging undesirables. Only the most determined of trolls would put in that much effort.

Same. Intro post. Fair also showed me a cool tool that lets you check if a poster's language use indicates they are male or female. Will have to test that out as well.

I'm thinking the "Don't" and "Appreciate if you wouldn't" sections should be bold. I do agree with the language, but am now realizing they should be uniquely dressed to capture attention somehow.

mr.anonymous wrote:I'm thinking the "Don't" and "Appreciate if you wouldn't" sections should be bold. I do agree with the language, but am now realizing they should be uniquely dressed to capture attention somehow.

Yeah, can change it.

Sounds good overall but I think it'll be important to differentiate between 'other' and 'off-topic' perhaps via the descriptions on the main page

or perhaps 'other' could have a different title altogether... it's a little vague imo

jovialsingleton1 wrote:Sounds good overall but I think it'll be important to differentiate between 'other' and 'off-topic' perhaps via the descriptions on the main page

or perhaps 'other' could have a different title altogether... it's a little vague imo

Yeah, agreed. Other is supposed to address key subtopics like Ghosting and Philosophical Tracts (which don't appeal to the majority of people but do matter alot to some). There may be other topics that fit this bill. Maybe what I can do is create a set of sub-forums for each of those sub-topics and call it "Specialized Topics". Or something.

Off-Topic is non-MGTOW. Welcome suggestions for a clearer name.