Hi, I'm Charles

Hi

I just wrote an intro 2 days ago ... so my enthousiasm for writing it all out has dimished a bit for now. Please forgive me for that, but here goes.

I'm 24, working as an architect (apprentice for now, but I have an income), I play piano and guitar, I'm a gamer and also a metalhead. I have two older brothers and an even older sister so I learned about the dysfunctional dynamic between men and women from a very early age. I've also been quite introverted for most of my life, but I've always defended my individuality even if they made me an outsider in some ways during my teenage years.

First off, my youngest brother (in fact 9 years older than me) was destroyed by his fiancee about 8 years ago. After getting engaged and buying a house it turned out she was cheating with his best friend no less ... Seeing a great man reduced to a specter of his former self because of the woman he was to dedicate his life to, was a real eye opener for me. Though in retrospect, I'm glad it came out before the marriage or the situation would have been much worse.
A few years later he found his current girlfriend and she completely took over his life as he had rebuilt it for himself. Within weeks she moved in with him and she threw out his music, stereo, furniture, clothing (a lot of which he still wore regularly) ... it was (and still is) painfull to see. As I was visiting once she didn't even flinch about scolding him about not texting her back within an hour (for something inconsequential) as she arrived at his place.
I warned him with my concerns, but this is the life he chooses over living on his own terms, so I let it go. He now has 2 kids with her and they bought a house together, though they aren't planning on marrying anytime soon it seems. In fairness, she tries her best to be a good mother and family member in general but it always comes across so forced. I can't seem to feel at ease with her around.

It almost goes without saying, this is a life I could never live. Though as I look around, most men seem to make the same choice he makes.

I could go on about my other family, as they seem to be a vertical slice out of society, but it boils down to that for most of my life I've been observing carefully and coming to the conclusion that none of them have a life I would want for my own.
About 18 months ago I've stumbled upon anti-feminism material, and eventually came across MRA's and red pillers. I eventually winded up discovering Barbarossa and Stardusk through RBK and from all the voices out there in this world, men going their own way are the only ones who I can truly agree with.
During this red pill period I was taking in a lot of information, but I kept bumping into the contradiction with al that I've been raised with so I had a long period of doublethink just because I couldn't imagine that for all my life I could have been lied to so fundamentally about everything.
When the anger came (it always comes when becoming a MGTOW it seems) it wasn't so much about the fact that girls and women have completely rigged the game, it was directed mostly at my parents in fact who have been systematically keeping a curtain over my eyes for how the real world actually is, instead of how they want it to be. (This may seem very generic, but it's a "you had to be there" kind of thing) That realisation triggered the anger but it was only after that cooled down and I observed my options in life that I dedicated myself to going my own way.

About the girls in my life, well there have been enough to know what vicious creatures they can be long before I found anything red pill related. I've always been attracted to the wrong girl at the wrong time though it seems, so I've been through some hair pulling situations with borderline girls, I once even was the guy a particular redhead cheated with and I only got to find out afterwards ...
So after a while of that, I decided to find a "good girl", pretty and kind. As it turns out, if you look in the right places and they're also not that hard to find and so my last relationship began.
After dating for a while, it seemed to become a solid relationship, but then the veneer seemed to crack bit by bit. As time went on she kept pushing me to fit more of a mold she wanted and eventually expected me to be. Had I not witnessed my brother's complete life invasion I might have stuck it out a bit longer than I had, but when it became transparent to me that she liked the potential of what I could be (to her) more than what I was I ended the relationship abruptly. Never looking back.

So that was my last relationship, I've since then lusted for more and have had opportunity for more, but I had gotten too good at looking through the facade and seeing that they want something from me instead of me. I'm also not interested in leading a girl on and seducing her for a quick bang. I just don't want that kind of drama in my life as well as being careful not to get someone pregnant.
After red pill though I realised that the situation was much worse than I could see before.

What going my own way meant to me didn't really change my way of life, though it definitely clarified it, but it changed my attitude towards how I direct my attention. I won't waste as muh of my time looking for NAWALT anymore as well as identifying myself as someone who will never marry, instead of just leading on about "yeah, someday I'll find her". It doesn't sound like much, but the weight that has been lifted of my shoulders because of this is quite extraordinary. It seems like my life has a renewed focus and direction instead of just paddling around in a world that doesn't make much sense.

Well anyway, that's the gist of it for now.
Thanks for reading and I hope to keep learning and hopefully provide some insights as well!

Cheers

Welcome aboard, Charles!

Or, considering your profession ... maybe I should say "Welcome Aboard, Howard Roark."

The realization that "they want something from me, instead of me" is a piece of crystallized wisdom. That "wanting something" is women's nature ... it would be rational of them to "offer something," but Femmunism International has re-structured Society so it is normal for women to demand, demand, demand, and scorn, shame, snark if their wide-blue-sky-crazy "demands" aren't met.

Welcome.

Hello Charles, Welcome! I can identify a lot with your story.

Great intro!

The Blue Pill programming is POWERFUL.  As you've seen from the stuborness of your brother's actions to go back once more to the well after such a traumatic experience.  Our society mass manufactures women for whom hypergamy (upgrading her man), or using him, or uses psychological techniques to break him down is not only what's expected, but how a shrewd woman navigates this world.  And that is what the Red Pill is up against.  We have our hands full because it is a siren song whose sway is almost complete.  We do not underestimate at all the challenge of having people see the light.  Even loved ones- your brother, your parents- are under the sway of what I'll call a "Program" which has intentionally been put into the human software of society.  It leads to 'automatic programming' - a hardened mindset which dictates behavior and does not change even when obvious evidence (Hypergamous Twats destroy our lives) suggests it should.  Some may like the analogy, some may not, but the reality is we're in a Matrix, a prison of our mind.  Going red pill, going MGTOW IS the jailbreak, and so congrats to you for pulling it off.

Where you go from here is the purpose of our coming from- making the most of the Red Pill lifestyle, finding incredible things to do with  the time.  Sounds like you have some interesting hobbies- would like to hear more about those in the "Living the Best Life" subforum when the new site launches.

Thanks guys!

Jagrmeister wrote:Our society mass manufactures women for whom hypergamy (upgrading her man), or using him, or uses psychological techniques to break him down is not only what's expected, but how a shrewd woman navigates this world.  And that is what the Red Pill is up against.  We have our hands full because it is a siren song whose sway is almost complete.

The way I see it, it is a skill they hone. And honed carefully they are capable of making us feel as if the sun is shining only on us ... and then they can just take that away as fluently as they gave it.

Charles Rising wrote:Thanks guys!

Jagrmeister wrote:Our society mass manufactures women for whom hypergamy (upgrading her man), or using him, or uses psychological techniques to break him down is not only what's expected, but how a shrewd woman navigates this world.  And that is what the Red Pill is up against.  We have our hands full because it is a siren song whose sway is almost complete.

The way I see it, it is a skill they hone. And honed carefully they are capable of making us feel as if the sun is shining only on us ... and then they can just take that away as fluently as they gave it.

Absolutely. To them it is not just a privilege, it is a right and a duty.

It's because we men - we, who keep the world going - don't even exist in the world-view of these Pampered Princesses.

Got a dose of that this afternoon in my neighborhood, up northwest of Washington DC USA ... we got 15 inches of snow yesterday. I spent the morning shoveling out my front walk, my back door (and a passageway through my patio), and my parking spots.

I live in a townhouse condominium, with a modest shopping-center in back of our condo. There's a "sidewalk," a concrete-paved path, that leads from the walk in front of my house to the back of the shopping center. I'm practical enough to recognize that this sidewalk hasn't shoveled itself since it was put in place, a few years AFTER I moved in ... so if I don't want to slip-and-slide on the ice, after a few hundred people have trampled the path into glare sheer ice, I'd better get the hell out there and shovel it clear. And I do so.

This afternoon, while I was clearing the public path, my next-door neighbor came strolling up the walk with her son ... and back, while I was still at work. On the way to the shopping-center, she admonished her son to get over from the freshly-shoveled path I was creating, to the "herd path" I would soon have to shovel clear. She showed no sign of recognizing her next-door neighbor ... in all fairness, I was wearing the high-visibility-yellow jacket that I prefer in the winter months. Maybe that branded me as a "hired day-laborer" in her tunnel-vision.

But on her way back, she acted as if I wasn't even there ... despite the fact that SOMEONE was clearing the sidewalk, so that she (and I) didn't go sliding over the ice and take a pratfall.

Well ... I shoveled the path clean for MY OWN sake. It's just what MEN do, isn't it? (But when I head South and sell the house on the corner, I doubt if there will be anyone motivated to clear that path as I did.)

I've let this topic die out, shame on me because there is more to be said! I'm in the process of moving out of my home nest and starting up a new metal band so I can only write stuff here when I'm not moving stuff, writing music or at work ... so bear with me and my slow posting habits. Or not. I don't tell you what to do.

A critical point in my letting go of the blue pill realm was a late night, partly drunk, conversation with my brother-in-law. This is a real stand-up guy, especially with dealing with what my sister puts him through, but he's not inclined towards MGTOW in the slightest. He's just one of those guys who has his shit together and has the luck of being in a position where the wife would be much worse off without him, so she doesn't take him to the cleaners in the usual method a lot of men on this forum are all too familiar with.
Well, how the entire conversation evolved is beyond the reach of my memory. But I clearly recall the essence and I believe it's of vital importance to any man going his own way.

We men are denied something essential starting from our earliest childhood, and it's denial has created in us the desire for it all the more: the acceptance of who we are. As an infant we develop a personality of our own, yet our parents have some expectation of how we are supposed to be, and any deviation from that expecation is punished in order to make us fit their mold for how they see is. This is what people call raising children.
Now of course, I realise that you can't raise a violent child or let them do whatever they want, but this isn't about just behaviour, it's about our essence of being, our soul.
So a large portion of our time is spent trying to claim attention: "look at me! see what I'm doing! see who I am!" and maybe if they're kind they'll give you the attention but nobody really gives a shit about who you are, they just want people (incl. yourself) to think that they give a shit about you.
And thus there is this disconnect between the attention given to you and the acceptance by people of you. This lack of acceptance is something I see throughout all MGTOW's backstory.
It's fundamental and the more we lack it, the more we yearn for it. We look for it in friends, family, teachers, coworkers and, of course, women.
But the kicker is:
NOBODY ACCEPTS WHO YOU ARE
Perhaps your closest friends may come in the vicinity of doing so, and you'll have support with one another but the truth is, we are on our own in this world and nobody is capable of comprehending the depths of another human being.

But oh how we long for it! How we wish someone can swoop into our world, peer into our hearts and see just exactly who we are, what we are, accept that and love us for it.
So enter the female ... who for millenia and aeons have survived by squeezing out the life force out of us men. One enters your life and, perhaps after a long enduring conquest of sorts, seems to be riveted by you, seems to gaze at you as if you are a wonder of the world, seems to see through all the facades and just fall in love ...
The effect on us is life changing. Finally! Someone not like the others! Someone who won't just switch sides as soon as I reveal my weaker sides ...
and she keeps doing that just as long as she isn't bored with you ... when she lessens the effort to make you feel that way, your dreamworld starts to fade bit by bit until you find yourself in a situation where you just wonder how it ever got this way?!

... well. The realisation of this was the tipping point for me and also the start of the anger phase.
I feel it's coming to a lower level now, and then learning about MGTOW and how so many men go through the same ordeal. Well, there is some weird kind of peace in knowing that this isn't just our bad luck, but the way the world turns. And so we opt out. Until the world changes or until we have gone our own way for the rest of our days.